it's been ten years since i left. a decade. in a decade, even mountains and rivers shift, they say.
i'm good. things are good. great, actually. the better days that i so desperately wanted are very much here and oh, you best believe i am relishing them through and through.
much has changed, naturally. life proves to me over and over that no matter what beautiful, flawless plans i create for it, it's going its own way and there's nothing i can do about it. and that's fine because i'm happy with where life has brought me. and that was always the goal, right? to be happy. i am happy. i have never been happier in my life. so much has changed.
so why am i here.
last night, i clicked on the blogger icon on a whim while looking for something else, and to my surprise this empty site was still getting visits. ten years of nothingness and still! surely most of the visitors must be folks that got lost looking for something that's not this, but i knew that some might be here fully knowing what this place is, looking for what used to be here, looking for who used to be here.
i guess that's not surprising considering how i pretty much disappeared into time and space for a lot of people i used to know. not intentionally, of course. a lot of relationships that used to be cherished were reluctantly but inevitably shed, because i've changed or they've changed, or because they'll never change or i'll never change.
because so much has changed, but not everything.
i still do the things i used to do, think the thoughts i used to think, feel the feelings i used to feel, just in variations now. i still love the things i used to love. still love the people i used to love.
in a decade even mountains and rivers shift, but they are still what they were. mountains and rivers.
the landscape of my life may have changed but i'm still here. whatever that may mean for you. still here. still me. still.
